21st Century Crisis

I'm so over food. I mean, what is it with this stuff? Is it really necessary to consistently refuel this body of mine three or more times a day? It just seems really fucking inefficient and yet another hurdle as I struggle to fulfill my posthuman future fantasy. The information singularity is the most exciting and anticipated near future event occurring in my lifetime, a technological event horizon from which there will be no return. And I'll probably be washing the dishes when it occurs. How the fuck am I supposed to prepare for this amazing and unpredictable event if I'm overwhelmed by monotonous minutiae unchanged for all of human evolution. Fuck you food! Get out of my exponentially changing future you unevolved human energy delivery system.

You know I find food so time consuming and irrelevant and.... erm... unfortunately, necessary. But for fucks sake, there has to be a better way to do this. It appears that I am either eating, buying or preparing food. Either that or else I'm thinking about the damn stuff. They're only calories for fucks sake, why isn't there a pill I can take that supplies all my energy needs?

I've been an avid reader of science fiction all my life and have been in awe of the future and the wonders I have been promised, the problems solved, the problems created. Well the future is here now and it's very fucking disappointing. Where the hell is my nutritionally balanced food alternative in an easy to swallow pill form? It can't be that difficult can it? And where's my bloody warp drive? It was in the brochure, I saw it  just over the page from the hover car.

Hmm, I am so over food.I really am. So over it. But I'm not stupid. I respect the scientific method and accept the objective and peer reviewed food theories that the scientific method has gifted to the world. I truly do respect the theory that you can live on food, but emphatically request that science create something more efficient, something radical and exciting and modern. A human energy delivery system that the 21st century can be proud of.

The future is coming and it looks beautiful, if only it would hurry up and get here while I'm still alive.

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